I did not see my candidate number on the SOA exam page

Nope, I did not pass exam M.

I brought my candidate number to work and I found out the result at the office today.

It's a mixed feeling----I felt disappointed yet I had a sense of relief. I felt relieved because finally the outcome was confirmed (right, luck is not on my side this time) and I can gear up to study it again.
Enough mourning.

Actually there are some lessons I can learn from this experience.

1. Sometimes, it's not really about what happened to us externally, it's about how we deal with/ think about it internally.

2. "If it doesn't kill me, it makes me stronger."

3. I need a different approach on studying more effectively.

4. Perhaps I can record this event to be another blog entry so I can encourage others and increase the readership of my blog! ;)

Plus, instead of being grumpy about the exam M I haven't passed yet,let me count my blessings here:

1. Two exams with Three VEEs

2. Graduated as a summa cum laude from a great actuarial business program.

3. Got a chance to launch my career in one of the best consulting firms in the world

4. Moved to a city I really like

5. having a free will and being alive.....(you got it)

It sounds like I'm in a pretty good starting point to cheer up and start studying again.